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Kate's Story: IVF, Infertility, Miscarriage and How to Cope Part 2

We speak again to the lovely mum Kate Meakin from https://mrsmeaks.com/ for the second part of her series.

Last time Kate shared a very honest and heartfelt account of her personal journey with IVF, infertility and miscarriage. This week she shares what helped her, the communities on and offline, the charities, the podcasts, and the self care rituals. 

We are so honored that Kate is open to sharing such an amazing and personal journey with our NESSA community. Kate champions the importance of raising awareness and creating a space where women can communicate with each other.

We celebrate her bravery, and her desire to help other women in similar situations 🙌💪🙌💪

 

                     ...................................................................................................

As I write this we are 8 weeks post miscarriage. A very familiar feeling of loss unfortunately for us and we are trying to navigate our 4th miscarriage and all the grief that comes with that.
My last blog post shared our fertility journey, now I want to share where we turn when we need some help. There is a huge TTC community online, through Instagram and Facebook. Many private groups that you can join, anonymously if you wish. It is a great way to reach out and connect with others.
The community I found online has always been my first shoulder to lean on, other than my family and friends. The love and support thrown our way always inspires me and you are immediately scooped up by others who know how you feel, and the right things to say. I am so glad I joined Instagram and started my blog after our first loss back in 2017.
There are also many charities that can help you with your infertility journey and dealing with any loss and grief. Below are just a few.
The Fertility Network
They are a National Charity, here for anyone who has ever experienced fertility problems.
Tommy’s
They provide accredited midwife-led pregnancy health information for parents-to-be, and funds research into the causes of pregnancy loss.
Miscarriage Association
If you have been affected by miscarriage, molar pregnancy or ectopic pregnancy, this website will provide the information and support you are looking for.

There are also some amazing podcasts to help you through the many stages of infertility.

 

You can search on Apple Podcasts, Spotify Audioboom and Acast.
Big Fat Negative - Emma and Gabby.
The myth-busting, fact-checking podcast about TTC, IVF and the trials of trying for a baby.
Fertility Life Raft - Alice Rose
An uplifting podcast supporting and empowering conversations with people who have been through a fertility struggle.
The Fertility Podcast - Natalie Silverman
This was the first ever podcast I found when I was going through IVF and Natalie has so many great guests and topics to help guide you through infertility.
 

Infertility can be a very lonely place.

Miscarriage and baby loss can hold a lot of shame. It is so important to feel like you have a safe space to talk about the struggles you face. But sometimes when you don't want to talk, simple self-care can really make the difference too.
When we were in the thick of IVF I always prioritised self-care. I made sure I made time for myself, especially when physically you are feeling so drained. I really enjoyed some of the below therapies whilst going through treatment and they had a huge positive effect on my mental health.
 
Manicure/Pedicure
Massage
Acupuncture
Reflexology
Reiki
Walking
Gentle exercise
Yoga
Pilates

Self care isn't selfish and you have to remember to be kind to yourself.

After each miscarriage I have reminded myself that whilst my body needs to recover, so does my mind. I also recognise when I do need some extra support, it doesn't always have to be traditional talking therapies. But when you do need to talk, the above charities offer such great support and it’s so important to be able to reach out when you need that.
For me, taking a walk and listening to one of the above podcasts became such a saviour and I hope anyone reading this can also use some of the tools above in their journey and also know that whatever you are facing, you most definitely do not need to face it alone.
Kate xx
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